Well it looks like I can type a little faster than I thought. I managed to find the website http://www.learn2type.com and did an online typing test. I was averaging around 45 WPM which is about 10 faster than the last time I checked. That’s encouraging. It means that my “craft” is getting better. Now I have to work on my wording. It seems that I have a ton of thoughts and ideas that I want to get typed out of my head -and they sound sooo great while they’re in my head too! Once I actually type them out, I’m just not happy with them at all. I sure hope to get better at expressing my thoughts in the near future….
My thoughts for the the day:
Early on in my life as a young adult (probably around the beginning of high school) I came to the determination that I just didn’t want to get married if I was still a virgin. Losing my virginity was a major goal of mine throughout all of my high school days (and I have a feeling that it was a lot harder to do that back then than it is now). I didn’t actually lose it until I was 17. I remember that moment still. I was thinking after it was all over, “Is that all?” All the craziness that us young, horny men go through is for this? Well, the answer is both yes and no. The truth is that we men are obsessed with the “next hunt”, because there is always that hope that the next conquest will be better than the one before. Sex is like that. There is a constant thirst for more -and it will never be quenched. Never. That thirst for more and more “satisfaction” takes many men to places that they would have never dreamed of at first. It can become embarrassing, shameful, or even something you’re proud of. In the end though, it only leaves behind a lot of damage in it’s wake.
I was definitely not a virgin when I got married. Neither was my wife. We dated for about a year and were engaged for about 5 months. In those short months coming up to our marriage, our impatience got the best of us both and we did a lot of things together that I will forever regret. The wedding wasn’t nearly as special for us as a result (not outwardly though). Every wedding I ever see now always makes me a little sad because of what we did with only a few short days left to wait. The moment we were on our honeymoon, it hit me. I had been duped! My whole life up until now, I was duped. Why would I need to be sexually “experienced” before we were married? Hell, we still didn’t know what to do with each other on our honeymoon. The difference is that we are now joined permanently together. We’ll have the rest of our lives to find out how to do it. We will become experts in what pleases each other! The difference now is the fact that I’m not the only man my wife has been with and vice-versa. If I want to, all I have to do is remember. We polluted our sexual relationship before we ever met -not that we have any problems with it!
But I can remember those feelings while we were still dating -“yearnings” would be more like it. I wanted to be with her physically sooooo much. I sometimes felt like I would just explode if I waited any longer. We both wanted each other terribly -and cut a lot of corners as a result. I can remember thinking that it would be just impossible to go another day without her touch.
…And the moment we got in that car leaving our wedding behind, all those feelings went away -in a flash. It’s been 6 years now and we’re only closer. I bet if I went back in time, found myself and shook around telling me to just hold on for a short time longer, I seriously doubt I would even believe myself! If I went back in time and said to me that I would be even closer that we were when we were engaged, I probably would say that that’s impossible -but we ARE closer now. I’m sure we’ll be even closer still a few years from now.
Don’t know if this helps anyone but at least I’ve gotten it out of my head!